Tashina Banks Rama Log 3

Reflecting on my leadership journey through the Bush Fellowship, from an Oglala Lakota perspective living on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation, I have grown as a leader in ways I hoped I would – I am more open to growth. I am more present. I am more committed to justice for my People, the Oceti Sakowin and our future generations. And I am speaking Lakota at a conversationally fluent-level which I did not think was possible.

The fellowship has deepened my connection to the Lakota language and the spiritual connections that come with intergenerational language learning. About 50% of my learning comes from first-language speakers who are my elders. Through my conversations with them either speaking with each other in Lakota or speaking in English about the spiritual connectedness the language brings, my world has exploded open! Today I am conversationally fluent and speak at least 2 hours of Lakota each day of my life. I am part of a circle of language learners who speak Lakota almost exclusively.

Soon after the fellowship began, I made a life-changing decision for myself to work only four days a week, reclaiming a free/personal day to focus on the fellowship plan. In doing so, I realized that if I was able to advocate for myself to work four days so that I could “reclaim” a day to live my life on my own terms, why couldn’t the entire organization workforce work four days so they could “reclaim” a day too. So soon after working out the administrative details, our entire workforce switched to a 4-day, 9-hour work week. We redefined “full-time” to 36 hours versus the 40 hours that Henry Ford initiated for the car production line circa 1893.

The first year of the fellowship was strongly focused on Lakota language acquisition. My activities were largely consumptive to learn and process. I consumed a ton of books – leadership books, autobiographies of native leaders, personal accounts of boarding school experiences, attended workshops, and examined historical articles about the origin of the colonization era for the Oglala Lakota community.

The second year has been focused on getting healthy. I have lost 25 pounds over the last 7 months and finally quit a nicotine addiction that began after my dad passed away. Finally I have been processing grief that has been emotionally holding me down for years. After completing the Four Years to Fluency program, I challenged myself to teach Lakota language for 1 hour sessions, 5 nights a week, for 16 weeks. In doing so, my Lakota comprehension and ability to hold conversations increased exponentially. I attend a variety of community events to be a presence and an advocate for coming together, often elders are present so there is Lakota being spoken which is when I pivot to becoming a student of the language, every chance I get. When I can understand a prayer, greetings or simple conversations about weather in Lakota, I feel like I am doing my part to keep the language alive. I can’t wait to see how far this language journey takes me!

The fellowship has strengthened my ability to work collaboratively with diverse stakeholders, including tribal leaders, members, community members and non-Indigenous partners. That said, my resilience to systemic barriers that continue to prevent people like me, that is short, brown and often female, from advancing has matured – I no longer take it personally, instead understanding that I am living among outcomes of systems that were designed for others to succeed – understanding this changed how I think and strategize about pathways forward. My adaptability skills have sharpened, my ability to pivot is stronger than ever. I have become a calmer leader who holds more empathy for those around me because I think differently of our community than I did 2 years ago – the fellowship provided the life changing pathway I needed to level up my leadership instincts, growth and thinking to new heights.